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Comedy.
Lifetime - “Northbound Breakdown”
Do you live in NJ and listen to punk rock?
Well I do. So I don’t know why it took me so long to post something like this. Probably has a lot to do with the fact that I don’t care much for blogging anymore I guess. Anyway, enjoy.
When I put the body wash on a wash cloth or something in the shower, I always draw the Pennywise logo.
My iPhone was stolen today.
Here’s the kicker… by a 4 year old. He must’ve picked it up when I was filling his prescriptions. By the time I noticed it was gone, it was already too late. I tried everything to contact his mother. I called the number in his file. Disconnected. I drove to the address in his file. Vacant.
I called the phone about a thousand times. Somehow the kid managed to figure out how to answer the phone. I thought I was golden.
“Hello?!” I said over and over. The kid never responded. I continued to call for someone, anyone. I heard his mother in the background yelling in Spanish. I yelled with hopes she’d hear me.
Nothing.
It seems hopeless, but I do have a couple more (very slim) options tomorrow. After that, it’s over.
I have an iPhone 3G S now. Sadly, it hasn’t helped ease the pain.
I guess you’ll just never get over your first dog, no matter how cute or fun the new one is.
:(
Kinda weird how Billy Mays died a week after I put that picture up. As Gary said, if pictures of Jay with Michael Jackson, Farrah Faucett, Ed McMahon, or Steve McNair surface anytime soon…
Well then it’s just time to cut ties with Jay, isn’t it?
By the end of the day, socks get dirty. I hate dirty socks. They’re all broken in. They aren’t as soft and fluffy anymore. They can be a little baggy. Sometimes they smell. A lot of times they smell. I don’t smell them on purpose, but you know… maybe when you’re cleaning your room, you’ll catch a whiff when you’re picking up clothes.
Everybody hates when socks get lost after you wash and/or dry them. If they didn’t get so dirty, imagine the money you’d save on socks. Where do they go??? Just another problem arroused by dirty socks.
I’m not going to keep talking about that though. It’d be too easy. There is something, however, that bugs the shit out of me.
When you wear white socks, they turn grey (or even black in some spots depending on how disgusting you are) when they get dirty. That makes sense, but what about black socks. Ahhh…
When black socks get dirty, the bottoms turn white. “Say what?!” you may be asking…
But yeah, next time you wear black socks, take a look at the bottoms at the end of the day. You’ll be wishing you wore your white socks that day every time.
*About to press ‘Create post’ now*
Billy Mays here with another fantasic product: The Jaymon
Jay, you lucky son of a bitch.
I like my music like I like my women… Loud and heavy!
BREAK ME OFF A PIECE OF THAT!
